Should Christians sterilize when facing genetic disorders?
Every time I do an Institutes study with college students at Christ the Word one of our favorite passages is the section titled "The Faith of Abraham" in which Calvin recounts the trials and sufferings by which God taught Abraham faith and weaned him from the world.
The section ends with God's command that Abraham sacrifice his son on Mt. Moriah:
But for a son to be slaughtered by his own father’s hand surpasses every sort of calamity. In short, throughout life he was so tossed and troubled that if anyone wished to paint a picture of a calamitous life, he could find no model more appropriate than Abraham’s! (Vol. 2, Ch. 10, Sec.11)
To be the source of your own child's death is a terrible form of suffering indeed. I was reminded of this section from the Institutes when I read recently of a Christian couple who took surgical steps to prevent further pregnancies after their number two child died of a rare genetic condition.
Despite our sympathy for parents who lose a baby, and despite a genetically-linked death appearing to arrive by the parents' own hands, we must ask whether such a response is consistent with faith in God.
My thinking on this matter is influenced both by Scripture and by personal experience. Tim's and my mother and father continued having children despite the death of our older siblings from genetic diseases. I suffer today from the same genetic disease (hemophilia) my oldest brother died of, and Tim and I had two additional brothers die as the result of another genetic disease (cystic fibrosis).
Our family scorecard is this: three children dead of genetic disease, two dying before adulthood, one with genetic disease (me) still living, a fourth brother dead at age five from juvenile leukemia and two normal (at least genetically) siblings also still alive. In short, the odds of our reaching adulthood weren't good.
I remember my mother once mentioning Christian friends criticizing her for continuing to bear children. Yet I'm sure that my gratitude to my mother for giving birth a sixth time despite the prior deaths of two of my older brothers and despite the likelihood that I too would inherit a threatening genetic condition comes as no surprise to my readers. Nor am I alone in this: each of us born with genetic issues was just as happy to have received the gift of life as our siblings born without genetic disease.
Need it be said? In the eyes of those doing the dying, it is better to live and die young than never to have lived at all.
But what of faith? And what of God? To my personal observations I would add seven Scriptural arguments against the practice of eugenics by parents--and believe me, it is eugenics to sterilize or practice birth control for the sole purpose of the prevention of congenital disease.
1.The Bible says that those who suffer in the flesh are free from sin. Suffering is one of the Spirit's great ways of spurring growth in faith and holiness, even of children at tiny ages.
2. Scripture says that God ordains the days of our lives. The life of a child who dies at three months may be incomplete in the eyes of the world, but it is a full and perfect life in the providence of God.
3. Suffering is good for parents and siblings as well as for the child who suffers in the flesh. Shall we accept good but deny suffering from the hand of God? What other forms of suffering from the hand of God would we say it is permissible in faith to preemptively exclude from our lives? Financial? Emotional?
4. If God creates the genetically impaired child and calls him good but we seek to prevent further such children because of our differing attitude toward them, what really separates our aproach from that of the mother who aborts a child with a fetal anomaly? I know, I know: the one denies life, the other kills. But to eyes of faith aren't the actions inevitably linked?
5. Where is faith in believing that God will not give us normal children? Or children who can one day be healed? Or children who will bless us and others in death?
6. If it is good and consistent with the will of God to stop bearing children in order to prevent suffering and limit the spread of congenital death, why didn't Adam sterilize himself after sinning in the Garden? Think of the human suffering and death such a focused act of sterilization would have prevented.
7. God's command to multiply was given despite the congenital death sentence of Eden (Genesis 9:1). God intended parents to pass on death to their children, not for parents to refuse to bear children because they would one day die.
I fear that I can only see such actions by parents as rejection of faith. And though this may seem a harsh assessment, I plead guilty to equally great failures elsewhere in my life. But failures of faith are not dealt with by sympathy. Sympathy excuses. The best response to failure is loving challenge and exhortation in accord with the Word of Truth.
(DB)
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Comments
At least genetically ... Excellent post.
Pr. David,
Thank you for these true and compassionate words, delivered from a standing and with credentials without which your exhortation would clang as a cruel and brassy bell.
This blog goes into my digital hidey hole, to be retrieved when I need such words for my flock when their conflicted hearts would happily reject anything like what you have said, except for the credibility the Lord has conferred on you and your family to speak such words.
David...thanks for this post. Would you be willing to email me about your Institutes study? This is something I have been considering doing in here with local college students, but haven't been sure about how to approach it.
yours,
pete
Dear Pete,
I'll be happy to. I'm looking at your blog for your email. If it's not there I'll have to descend into the bowels of TypePad to get it from your comment. Either way I'll persevere.
Love in Christ,
David
This was very helpful to read. Thank you for speaking the truth.
What a powerful testimony you share here. Thank you for sharing a strong & sensitive faith.
Our first born had a fatal birth defect, which some believe could be genetically linked. We have had 4 healthy children since then. We praise God for all 5 of them!
Dear Erin,
You're the hero of faith. May God grant you joy as you think of Gabriel's presence at His right hand.
Love in Christ,
David Bayl
Thank you David! Sorry I accidentally reposted my comment. Oops!
Thank you for this!
In our current Christian culture, we do not always consciously think about a child's _purpose_ or a child's _time_.
What is his purpose? We say automatically, "To glorify God and enjoy Him forever, " but if this is true, then his _purpose_ is not to be a blessing and comfort to his parents.
Discussion of how much a blessing he is, compared to something else that we might rather have, misses the point, as does speculation that our little blessing might even become a curse if he turns out to be a very bad boy.
Our sons and daughters are not made for us, as if they were new milk cows or cuddly puppies. Our children are created _for God_, to glorify and enjoy Him forever. (People and angels are perfectly suited, both to reflect God's glory and to worship Him forever.)
If for God, then our little ones are not even made for themselves. Their end is not their own comfort, to enjoy themselves as much as possible, but in every last case they are created _for God and for His glory_. Sickness or weakness don't change that essential purpose.
Could a disabled or dying child fail to fulfill His true purpose? He could not, _Even if he were to hate God_, he could not, for God is also glorified in the holy exercise of His perfect justice.
We live what we believe.. If our _reason_ for rejecting a disabled or dying child is our convenience or his comfort, we are not believing an essential part of the Gospel.
And time? What is a child's time? His time is all future times: eternity. Just like Adam, our children are created eternal beings. As God has mercy on them, their bodies will be made new and perfectly whole, because they were given "souls that can never die."
This means that, really and truly, all disabilities, diseases, and deaths are temporary, reversible, and curable. Everyone alive stands at the very edge of a great day when everything bad "comes untrue," where everything bad becomes the best that could possibly be--and for those of us under the mercy, we will see that day with the greatest possible joy.
But for now, what do we do? We take our little teaspoonful of time and, gazing intently at the deep sorrows in it, we walk up to the shore of the mighty and endless ocean of eternity and say, "This that I have in my hand, this is what matters most to me."
How we do this, I cannot fathom, but we do it. (Since the Fall, none of us living have ever been fully normal.)
So, what if you knew that your child would suffer for an hour after birth but then would enjoy perfect health and wealth and comfort and (best yet) joy for all the rest of his life? Would you say that, to avoid an hour that is soon forgotten, you would rather he not have a lifetime of blessings?
No matter how bad, sad, and cruel a disability or disease might be, this is just exactly the choice we have. We think 80 years is a long time. We even call it "a lifetime," but it is only the beginning of something infinitely better in Christ. Compared to eternity, the difference between 8 minutes and 80 years is small.
It's not for me to fret about other peoples' choices, for our choices can't possibly derail the history that God has ordained. The child who was never born was never going to grow up to cure cancer, for there is no "alternate timeline." God has already written His beautiful story, and He moves His players into position on time, every time.
But we Christians have a duty to believe that our children are _for God_ and made to _live forever_. If this is what we really believe, there will be an inevitable impact on the growing population of the covenant community to whom Genesis 1:28 and 9:1 are chiefly given. More and more, we will not think like the world thinks, and many of our decisions will look very strange to it.
I have friends who have few or no children whose hearts are very much, even daily, taken up with the realities that children are for God, and for eternity. And I have many more friends who take deep comfort in the truth that God's history cannot possibly be derailed.
So, does all this truth mean the exact same thing to every single individual, in every single circumstance? I don't think so, but we are one Person, one Bride, one covenant community, and we make our choices in community. It's to be expected that we will increasingly be known for our courage and for taking the long view on the great questions of life.
We are so used to thinking that God called 1st century Christians to bear children in peril and under a death sentence, to die in the arena giving glory to God.
We are used to thinking that God called 18th century Christians to slog through disease-infested swamps to bring the Gospel to remote peoples, burying spouses and children along the way.
But we are uncomfortable wihen 21st century Christian parents forsake "being all that they could be" and "getting all that they could get" to embrace their own disabled and dying children, receiving them by birth and by adoption and serving them wholeheartedly, painfully, _and joyfully_, for the glory of God, to see His Kingdom increase.
Wherever Christians are called to bear joy and grief together, be certain that they were not called to bear them alone. Where there is a way to support weary arms and listen to weary hearts, we the Body have a duty to find it.
I Corinthians 4. I read it slowly and then I read it again. It is not just a comfort in hard times, but infallible counsel for making hard decisions.
Dear David,
I can't begin to tell you what an encouragement this is to me. Praise God for the work He has done in your life and your family. Praying for you brother!
Love always,
David,
Thank you very much for this outstanding post.
And Valerie, thank you very much for your outstanding comment.
I give glory to God for both of you and how this truth encouraged me in my ministry. God bless you both. Thank you.
One variant on the situation you describe is couples who choose not to have children, or more children, because of issues to do with the parents' health. Presumably the same reasoning as you have outlined above would apply? I have a couple of sets of friends in this situation; both couples had gone into marriage wanting large families, but severe maternal health issues along the way basically meant that neither couple could face having more than the one child apiece they did have.
On a sort-of related note, you make a comment to the effect that what you need is not sympathy, because 'sympathy enables'. No doubt I have missed something here, but what is the difference between sympathy and compassion?
Thank you, David, for writing this. As I read it, I could not help but think of our dear brother Bob Kaplowitz, about whom Tim wrote here earlier, and how loved he is and how he brings glory to God in his ministry to young men - just by being here. We are all waiting to hear the latest update on his condition as he wrestles with life and death in the hospital. The grief when there's a downturn, or the absolute joy when he is feeling good enough to smile at us is so very real. Yet, that isn't even the point. Bob is so loved, but even if he were not, God would still be glorified in Bob's being: HE IS MADE IN THE IMAGE OF GOD.
I have no doubt that your losses have helped mold you into the very real, no-nonsense pastors that you & Tim are, and whom we have come to love dearly. Thank you for blessing us with this post.
Speaking as a mother who has one child in heaven from an illness that the doctor's have no known cause(leukemia) and having born two children since... Children are a blessing no matter how long they live. I learned things from God during Abigail's illness that I am very thankful for. She grew both my husband and I in our faith and my oldest daughter has a greater understanding of the brevity of life and the importance of making it count for Christ (she was 2.5 when Abigail died). I will admit the first child born after Abigail was hard - I struggled with worrying over the length of her life - but God faithfully showed me His goodness in all things. When baby number 4 had an abnormal ultrasound, I was so thankful that God had showed me His faithfulness through parenting the previous three children and, being surrounded by prayer, didn't struggle with letting my thoughts wander to the "what ifs". I was able to trust God with whatever her life would be... and she is totally normal (at least as normal as one of my kids can be!)
Dear Julie,
We remember Abby with joy. I changed Bibles recently and when I did, I changed the picture of her over to the new Bible. Love.
Valerie, Thank you for your fine comment. I appreciate it greatly.
Phil, Thanks for you prayers, brother. Love you.
And all the other friends... Thanks for your kind words.
David Bayly
Wish you all could not only meet our precious Shannon who is profoundly disabled (google Joni and Friends When Disability Hits Home to learn more about her). But also wish you all could meet our Erin Claire and Maili, two precious saints born after we learned of Shannon's challenges. It was a perverse pleasure to respond to the doctor's insistence that we get all sorts of genetic testing done to reply, "Why? If we should be blessed with more like Shannon we will thank our Father. If He should give us children without disabilities we will thank our Father." We adopted our Reilly and Donovan not because of our genetic issues, but because they needed to be adopted, and we were hoping to be blessed still more.
Dear RCJR,
I've appreciated your commitment in this area. May God bless you for it.
Love in Christ,
David
I am very grateful for having the chance to read this exhortation. I've been under Pastor Tim's preaching in Bloomington, but never knew this about your family. Grasping the Sovereignty of God has never been more difficult, now that I am a mother. Although I have been blessed with two healthy daughters thus far, it has been hard to think that my children are His -- not mine. It sounds like your mother (and father) truly believed in a Sovereign God.
With the logic used in this article technically anytime a wife isn't pregnant she is denying potential life. I think couples should be able to decide when to stop having children without being called cowardly or unfaithful especially if they are already raising Godly children. I find this post to be incredibly insensitive. There is no reason why a woman should be told she cannot sterilize herself if she is uncomfortable withe bearing another child for whatever reason. It is her body. May we at least give her freedom in this respect? She may have other callings God is calling her towards at the moment as God speaks to all of us in different ways in our lives. With all due respect I think this post oversteps and assumes some are unfaithful when they are really choosing what is best for their existing family, their own health, and their calling.
Along the same lines as the last comment, the apostle Paul would also be guilty of a "rejection of faith" since he "pre-emptively excluded the suffering" of his imaginary children by remaining single. In other words, the reasoning here is nonsense. And point #1 in particular could be used to justify all sorts of evil.
I should have said every time a wife isn't trying to have a child. What about those like Albert Mohler who agree with birth control? Everytime they or another couple use it they are denying the potential lives of other children for w/e earthly reason. They are too busy raising their own children, the wife is not ready to have another child yet etc. If a couple is raising a few kids and decides they do not have the means or the energy to raise more I think they should be able to make that decision for themselves, Whether they are carriers for a genetic disorder or not. To multiply is not the only task given to couples in Christ.
I should have said that I used to be under Pastor Tim's preaching; unfortunately we had to move away in 2009...
@ Lily: I have been pondering on your comments today because I think my flesh really wants me to believe them. In theory I can understand why my husband and I should have as many children as God gives us, from a Biblical perspective; however without going into too many details about our personal situation on this blog, I also cannot imagine from a "practical" perspective being pregnant and/or nursing until I run out of eggs. It made me think of a book that I recently read in Sunday school called "Respectable Sins" by Jerry Bridges. The purpose of his book is to bring to light many of the not-so-obvious sins that we often brush under the rug as not being sins, or as being less severe than the more obvious sins (i.e. adultery, murder, drugs, etc.). One chapter focused on the sin of "ungodliness" and explained that ungodliness doesn't equate to atheist. Every single decision we make every single day should have only one overarching purpose and that is to glorify God. If we were perfect and sinless, no decision would ever be made for "ourselves" so to speak, only for God. Am I practicing this on a regular basis...heck no. Do I believe that my body is God's, not my own (or even worse, that my body belongs to my husband, now that we are one flesh? Definitely not!). I can only pray that God will give me more grace to make better choices for Him as I grow in my faith. However, am I convicted that my flesh and thoughts constantly turn away from God? Even when the thoughts appear to be godly discernment and wisdom? Yes, I am convinced of that.
I don't know if this answers your question and I am by no means the mature-Christian-expert in this audience, but I did want to share that with you.
I can't tell by your reply because it was very personal and heartfelt but I wanted to make sure that you know that I actually disagree with this article and was commenting on it in that light.
>> I think couples should be able to decide when to stop having children without being called cowardly or unfaithful especially if they are already raising Godly children. I find this post to be incredibly insensitive. There is no reason why a woman should be told she cannot sterilize herself if she is uncomfortable withe bearing another child for whatever reason. It is her body. May we at least give her freedom in this respect? She may have other callings God is calling her towards at the moment as God speaks to all of us in different ways in our lives. With all due respect I think this post oversteps and assumes some are unfaithful when they are really choosing what is best for their existing family, their own health, and their calling.
Lily,
You speak as if as Christians we are independent of our Lord. But this is not the case: as Christians we are no longer slaves of sin, but we are not independent. Now we are slaves of righteousness:
"But thanks be to God that though you were slaves of sin, you became obedient from the heart to that form of teaching to which you were committed, and having been freed from sin, you became slaves of righteousness." - Rom 6:17-18 NASB
What is the defining characteristic of a good slave versus a wicked, rebellious slave? It is obedience to the master. As Christians where our good Lord has spoken our desire is to obey. I can't see any desire to obey in your comments - it's all about owning her own body and doing as she pleases. Take care for your soul, Lily!
Possibly though you speak this way because you believe that our Lord has given no command and this is an area of Christian freedom. In that case, you should say "It's wrong to try to bind the conscience where God has given us no command." (And then we can point to the places where God *has* given the command).
Are we obedient slaves or rebellious slaves, and who is our master? We are not our own, we were bought with a price.
Thank you so much for this post it has helped me greatly. I've always been a Christian, although not very spiritual. Last week my husband had a vasectomy against my wishes. I thought I could just deal with it, but had a very real spiritual experience. Rage overcame me and as I sat alone I began to shake, i knew it had to be fixed at the urging God is not done with our family.I knew it was wrong and couldn't let it go. My husband seeing how this has affected me agreed to a reversal, which will be scheduled next year. Then today we got the genetic results back on our daughter and her diagnosis. I've had a friend say he did the right thing, but I felt like this took away from the path God is leading us. His son has something genetic going on as well, though undiagnosed. Then there is our youngest daughter who is perfectly healthy. I know if God blesses us with more children they will be perfect and loved even if there is something different in the genetic makeup. Thanks again.
This post is very old and only by the divine power and wisdom of God did He lead me to this. I have searched and searched for something like this and NEVER found it, but the one time I'm looking for something else? God led me to what you wrote! I have literally never visited your blog before so I apologize for not even knowing what you usually blog about.
I am still in awe of reading this! I literally gasped out loud. I am a carrier of hemophilia. My father had hemophilia so I was known to be a carrier from the beginning. My mother has always been very vocal with her disgust for hemophilia. She aborted 2 children and used a sperm donor with her third to ensure a "perfect" child. My mother claims the salvation of Jesus but she does not openly talk about her life so I do not know if she grieves these sins or not. I fear she still feels life is in the hands of humans vs the hands of God, as many christians do.
I view life completely differently than my mother so I feel attacked when I announce the good news of a new pregnancy as she sees it as my husband and I being selfish. Which disturbs me because it is the most UNselfish thing we can do - to be open to any and all life God chooses to give us.
My firstborn is my son. He has hemophilia. My second and third are girls and I do not know if they are carriers as we haven't had them tested. This is literally the only article I have ever read that has dealt with trusting God even in the face of hemophilia. THANK YOU for writing this!!! I am filled with joy that God sent me your way. Choosing life - to trust in God with any life He may desire to give, when you know you may produce a child with a very rare and costly and potentially life-threatening disorder is difficult to say the least. Reading this has me feeling like this may be my testimony but I'm fearful to tell people, "Yes, we are trusting God to give us the children He wants us to have AND.....by the way, I'm the carrier of a rare genetic disorder" is just asking for harsh judgements by "well meaning" christians who feel it's wrong to bear a child knowing he/she may suffer. Oh the ways in which the world has been deceived.
I could go on and on and on, but I won't. I'm just so overjoyed to know I'm not alone. Do you have kids? It's very different to be a product vs the producer. However, your perspective has given me hope that my son may grow up with your perspective - not drowning in pity or attempting to end the line of hemophilia in his family, but thankful and blessed to be alive - to see and feel firsthand the hands of the almighty God and that He never makes mistakes - that trusting God in all things is good.
Dear Lindsey,
I'm so happy my post helped you. Did you read the comment by Valerie Jacobsen (about ten comments before your own)? Valerie's comment was so good that, if I could, I'd take down my own words and replace them with her comment in the main post.
It may be that your son has a tougher row to hoe with hemophilia than I've had. My own mild-to-moderate hemophilia at no point threatened my life, despite it taking my older brother's life through a sledding accident.
I took factor infrequently as a child. Ironically, factor itself was more life-threatening than any bleed. I grew up in the AIDS-infected-blood era, before factor was treated to kill the virus. Virtually all hemophiliacs who received factor in those days are now dead. God graciously kept me from requiring factor during those years. I had no major bleeds, and the few minor bleeds that arose I forged my way through until they ultimately healed.
It sounds as though your son's hemophilia may be less-than-severe as well since your father grew up and lived into adulthood, ultimately marrying and having children. Hemophilia's severity is transmitted genetically making it unlikely that your son's grandsons will have hemophilia more severe than his own. (In fact, as the daughter of a hemophiliac, you are likely to have at least some bleeding disorder yourself--something to bear in mind if you ever need surgery.)
As I understand the genetics of hemophilia, each of your daughters has a fifty percent chance of being a carrier while your sons have a fifty percent chance of receiving the condition.
Please do not fear the condition. It doesn't deserve your worry as a disease, nor should you fear its effects spiritually.
As a disease... Not only do hemophiliacs rarely die from the condition today, treatment is constantly improving. Factor 8 deficiency, in fact, is the sole genetic condition to have been improved by gene therapy--severe hemophiliacs with factor levels under one percent have been raised to moderate hemophiliacs, allowing them to live near-normal lives without the need for constant transfusions of factor. Your grandsons stand a good chance of never needing factor.
And spiritually... What better way to show your children the glory of faith than to live without fear, following God's command to be fruitful and multiply, in the face of this disease your mother cowered in front of?
I have two daughters, both of whom are obligate carriers, and they have not the slightest fear of the implications of this. They trust God. Neither is married yet, but I believe hemophilia will play a negligible role in their marriages and child-bearing decisions. They've seen God's goodness to me and they trust it for themselves, I believe.
I'd be happy to write you further in private or answer any questions you may have. Feel free to contact me at email address listed on the side of the blog.
And thanks again for writing.
Love in Christ,
David
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