Consumer report: Chinglish SUV buying guide...

Our automotive correspondent, Ben Crum, writes: This year's Detroit Auto Show featured an exhibit of two cars recently released by China's fledgling automotive manufacturer, Changfeng Motor Company, Ltd.

If there's one thing I know about Americans, it's that they're in the market for SUVs. (If you're not American, SUV stands for "Get out of my way--I'm an American.") Like most of you comrades, there are very particular attributes that attract you to the specific SUV that you will inevitably buy. You may not know this, but China is hoping to cash in on the west's SUV craze--and from the glossy brochure they had available in their exhibit, it seems like they have a pretty firm grasp on what SUV-buying Americans are looking for. So here are a few pictures of Changfeng's brochures.

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Well, that goes without saying. I mean, why would I want a vehicle that would ever disappoint me?
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Hmm, well I haven't done much market research so maybe Americans are looking for a "well-stacked and smooth" bodied SUV.
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Now this is right on. Why would anyone settle for a semi-excellent vehicle body when they could have the "Superexcellent Internal & External Quality" offered by this auto maker?
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Now, I was really excited about getting my SUV equipped with a "Glass Antenna" and "Plastic steel spare tyre cover" (though I was disappointed to find no Sidon cover). But then look at the bottom - they reserve the right to interpret... Yikes!
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So if this list fulfills your own requirements for a new SUV, you'll sure want to check out the new Liebao Black Giant.

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I'll plow it into my mighty garage and gaze at its broad shoulders and hear its strong, giant, mighty roar as a majestic lion on the plains of the mighty Serengeti.

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